Hawk Eyes

Thursday I dropped the kids off at school and was on my way to the San Isidro feria. On a curve I passed what looked to be a dead Hawk in the middle of my lane. I swerved to go around it. I glanced back in my rear view mirror and I thought I saw it move. I pulled over and turned around. He was alive! I stopped the car went over to him and picked him up and held him in my arms. I took him quickly back to my car so we would both be out of harms way. Sitting with him in the car and spoke calmly to him. He was beautiful, more than beautiful majestic. I had an animal in my arms that had never had contact with a human being before let alone in ones car. His eyes where brilliant orange. He seemed in shock but not badly hurt. His feet were curled this worried me a bit but other then that he seemed in good shape. I told him I was going to take him to someone who could help. I drove to Los Alamos a vet that I have known and trusted for many years. We were about 20 mins away. The hawks energy seemed to be improving on the drive. He sat on my lap the whole way there and when we arrived out front of the vet we had 15 mins until they opened. I feel SO grateful for those fifteen minutes! When I stopped the car he was looking directly at me. I moved my hand from the steering wheel and I could tell that my sudden movements made him nervous. He opened his mouth and seemed to be ready to defend himself. So, we sat there and stared into each other's eyes for 15 minutes! I thought peaceful thoughts of him healed and flying in the sky where he belonged. I wanted to convey to him that he was in no danger and my only intention was love and for his well being. He seemed to understand. He closed his mouth after the first minute and relaxed on my lap. Still staring into my eyes but with out the intense air of fear. When the vet assistant arrived and came up to the car the hawk got spooked and flew to the passenger seat. The vet then said "I will be right back with a crate for him".  Once again I looked into this amazing animals eyes and told him it is ok. He allowed me to pick him up and return him to my lap. We stared at each other for a while longer. When the assistant returned I placed him in the crate. He seemed to know everything was going to be ok, he trusted me. He didn't flap his wings or struggle. An emotion came over me that felt like sweet sadness. I was sad to leave this awesome creature but was full of gratitude feeling so incredibly blessed to be graced by its presents. What an awe inspiring experience. I can still see those golden orange eyes that looked into my soul ... I think I will see them for the rest of my life. 

I later found out he was taken to the animal sanctuary near Dominical called Alturas Wildlife Sanctuary where he is well on his way to recovering!

Teaching Kindness

 My husband and I weren't going to send my almost 5 year old daughter to kindergarden this Monday. She was at the tail end of a slight cough almost fully recovered. We thought one more day of rest at home is all she needed. She woke up early and her daddy went into her room to snuggle. He told her "Brooke your going to stay home today with mommy". She was terribly upset. Brooke loves school. We live in Costa Rica and she goes to the public school where everyone speaks Spanish. Although she was born here her father and I are English spoken from the east coast of the states. She is doing very well learning Spanish but as you can imagine it must be frustrating not always be able to communicate with your classmates. Brooke is my high spirited, strong willed, warrior princess. So even though some days she comes home frustrated she is always excited to go back and do it all again. She loves school! She begged her dad to let her go to school. In a final plea she said "But, I have to go to school to teach those kids how to be nice!" That is my warrior princess who I am sure will accomplish amazing feats in her lifetime!

FB in my dreams

   I had a dream last night. It was so vivid that when it came to me this afternoon I was not completely sure if it had been a dream or a waking memory. I recalled a post from FB. It was a list of numerous previous posts that an individual brought together to make a point. Many of which I recognized being posted on my own news feed by friends. One of these was showing dog abuse and the person responsible. Another post was naming people that were supporting GMO. Another posted pictures of animals abused in the meat and dairy industry. The over all message of the post was telling people to stop placing the blame. Stop reposting photos of horrendous acts to get the message across that it is wrong. As I was reading the post I agreed with it but at the sametime I noticed that they too were reposting horrendous acts to get their point across. This was only continuing to keep it in the minds of the masses under the guise of preventing acts of cruelty. To focus on these things is to give it power wether it be positive or negative it is power, a charge to stay in the conciousness of the masses. For example a dog will stay with an abusive owner because it is given attention, not loving attention as we precieve it but attention non the less. All we truly have control over is ourselves and on what we decide to put or attention.  We decide what seeds we want to sow and carefor with loving thoughts. Placing the blame is not changing the world or our thoughts about it. Thinking of how we can share loving thoughts and what we can post that may lift someone's spirits rather than bring a cloud of hopelessness. Share ideas of compassion and forgivingess for those that "no not what they do". Compassion, forgiviness, ultimately sharing love will change the world! 

   

Pupils of God

Can you see my daughter taking a photo of my eye?

     I am always coming from the view that God or Source is within me (us). The window through which I observe life is centered in the penetrating, dark, black hole of my pupils. The eyes are often called the window to the soul. When visions are perceived through my pupils it evokes an emotion and experience, becoming part of my consciousness influencing my vibration and creating who "I am" now. I've been told we are made in the image of God or Source? I see the the black holes of the universe as the pupils of God Source. I see the universe being absorbed by these black holes bringing all it perceives into the consciousness of God. I also feel that Source is constantly evolving and our vibrations have the capacity to change the face of God. As God evolves so does all of existence because we are all a spark of that Source influencing all that is. 

 

Perception and knowledge

Morning Meditation

Perception and knowledge

 When I look at the palm tree I see long thin leaves growing together on a single stem forming a natural fan. I see many of these on a single tree. The shades of green reveal to me the age of each branch from fresh delicious emerald green, to deep forest, and ultimately sun bleached yellow. Clumps of fallen bamboo leaves littering its palms. A smooth bark that sheds in sheaths. Lizards running up, down, and all around its living home. This is My perception of the tree outside my window. 

  If I were asked to take a deeper look and look beyond what my eyes perceive I might get closer to the truth of what is really there. Roots in the soil mingle with its brother the bamboo. I am touched by those roots beneath this very floor upon which I am sitting. They exist together providing for each other support. There is an exchange of breath as is above so is below. This tree is alive it feels my presents. This tree is perhaps more conscious then I am most of the time. Absent is its choice for freewill. In a constant state of meditation. There is much to learn from this projection of mind. Always in the now not concerned about the past. It does not hold a grudge against me for building fences, not showing favor, or even for never truly acknowledging its presents. If I choose to focus on loving this tree it will only grow in strength and beauty because I Am a witness to the knowledge of the truth that really is.

 Even deeper...

  The delicious emerald leaves mirror the gratefulness of deep fundamental relationships. Giving thanks for all that came before to nurture this present moment. The deep forest green giving confidence that all is well right now. All that is needed is being provided. An exquisite example of trust and acceptance. The sun bleached yellow leaves being called back to the sun. It's color being not lost but absorbed. A badge of knowledge proving life is always complete. The smooth bark sheaths shedding thoughts that no longer serve. As they lay on the ground brilliant orange and burgundy I see their beauty for what they were and what they will become. When all comes full circle it will begin again by feeding into what is most needed in this present moment. 

  Oh...and of the lizards.... They remind me to dream without attachments. 

Blessings

Remember

  Taking all back to light. Back to the place of timelessness. Remember...you had only forgotten. You are perfect complete nothing can be taken from you. You are made from love. Every situation YOU put in your path to remember to awaken. The blocks are not your enemy but a gift that you have not recognized. Perspective. You are diving in the pool of remembrance... Let go.  Open your eyes the eyes of your heart. You are a facet of a perfect diamond, nothing can change that because it IS who you are.

Superheroes

   A man with superhuman strength is ourselves. We are superheroes. For what we perceive as superhuman we feel no one like us is worthy. This is not true. One can not be sent from "above" that is above what we are capable, that would shadow the truth. Open our minds and our hearts. Loving our neighbor as ourself includes ALL and this is how we will heal the world and be one with God, Source, higher self, Jah, Jehovah, ... ultimately the " I AM".   It must start with "ME". I love you all no matter what your beliefs. I choose to love because I believe that is the only way to lift up the world. Perhaps to love ALL is a "superhuman" strength that I believe we are all capable. 

Name of God

I agree that Jehovah is God. I believe that any reference to God the source of light that is love and all that is, is the name of God. To rejoice in his name is to not deny his existence in the light of anyone's eyes. But, to band together in the holy truth of knowledge that is his. The light in me recognizes the light in you. 

Photo: The Hebrew Tetragrammaton that represents Gods name in the bible. It is a form of a Hebrew verb meaning "to become"

Open Heart

This a Facebook post from a few years ago when I first

 

I feel a desire to share this with all my friends and family. I want to open up doors of communication because this is how I will truly know myself. 

I am on a journey for truth and I'm opening myself to infinite possibilities as to not be boxed in and limited to what is already known. As for the God in the bible... I was raised catholic and have been a self proclaimed catholic drop-out after I did not follow through with confirmation in the 10th grade. I felt as if I was not being told the whole story by the church, it did not feel genuine. I didn't want to follow blindly to be excepted only to acquire a false sense of security. After 10th grade I didn't think much about the Church, God, or why I was here. Until December 10th 1999, I was 23, and my fiancé was killed in a car accident. I had a premonition or a feeling something was not right. I remember sitting in front of the TV watching Providence and looking at the stone wall of the fireplace. It was like a daydream or a vision of Josh in a hospital bed and me by his side. I then got up from the couch and called the hospital. I don't know what came over me but "I KNEW" something had happen. I called the wrong hospital. With in 15 minutes his grandfather called me and I dropped to my knees before he even said anything. I went to the hospital and spent the night by Josh's bedside just like the vision I saw on the fireplace wall. I got to spend one night with him saying my goodbyes and in the morning they turned off the machines and he was gone. This is a day I have just recently come to know as my Birthday. This was the day I started to question and ask why! It was the day I woke up! Many things happened after this event that I can not explain but I know to be true. Because of Josh I found my Soul and for that I am eternally grateful. I always knew what my Soul was. As a child I knew it as that part of me that knows I exist. The part that observes and knows it's self to be eternal. I just never made the connection of that feeling being my Soul. Without the experience above that shifted my perspective I may of never questioned my existence with such intensity. 

Now, I am married to an amazing man and have 2 beautiful little girls. I find myself learning about existence through observations. Children helped me to gain amazingly insightful multi-dimensional perspective. I find myself looking at the bible with new eyes as well. I have a hard time understanding or believing a lot of what is written but I am coming to realize that the bible too is perspective. I am in constant evolution changing my perspectives for a better upstanding of all that is. 

I feel so grateful to be able to share my experience. Thank you all of you!

Know the Truth

  To know the truth is to align with all that is an expression of love. A thought other then Love can not be truth. The truth is I love everyone. When I have an aversion to someone it is because I feel threatened, but to realize this is to know it is not coming from that person it is only a reflection of something I have not forgiven in myself. Forgiveness is extremely powerful more powerful then hate even death. To forgive allows for the child within us to feel safe and shine. Who doesn't feel the connection to a smiling child. Who's heart doesn't leap at the sweet sound of a child's laugh. It's because we all deserve to be loved as children. We are in the scheme of time children. Do we ever stop learning as children? No. We are always evolving coming to knew revelations that open our awareness to forgiveness. I forgive everyone because that is what we all in our deepest thoughts and desires  wish for ourselves. No one is unlovable it is after all from where we came. 

Namaste

Lighthouse Dream

   Shortly before the dream that profoundly changed my life I heard a voice as clear as if he was beside me speaking into me ear. " These are the revelations....". I sat up in bed and looked around for the source of the voice to finish his sentence. I am alone except for my sleeping child laying next to me after a mid morning nap.

   A Course In Miracles calls it "The Holy Instant".  At the time of this dream I had never heard of the Course. 

   It is early morning before the sun has risen or perhaps at the exact moment of the rising sun.  In the dream I witness a serene landscape. I feel content and at peace. I am hovering over a lighthouse or what I believed at the time to be a lighthouse. The ocean is calm except for a storm far off in the distance. I have a feeling my family is out there. I feel as if I need to bring them in but it's not with a sense of urgency. I am an observer.  The sand is a golden hue that reveals to me it is perhaps early morning. There was a feeling of newness, beginning, a sort of perfect timelessness.  (These abandoned  "lighthouses" a total of 11that line the shore between Bethany Beach Delaware and Fenwick Island Maryland. I later found out they are watchtowers.) As I focus in, the "lighthouse" suddenly lights up with an amazing brilliant light and within the same moment all the "lighthouses" light up for miles. Now there is only light! This whole dream takes place in this one instant (a holy instant).  If it had not been so powerful it would not have entered my conscious because it existed outside of time. It was illuminating and continues to be so. If felt as if someone turned on the lights and all truth was revealed. Truth exists outside of time and space because it has no need. In the dream I AM the perspective of light. This is what I came to understand or remember... Our Source is light. Light is truth. Truth is love. Forgiveness and compassion are ours to give so that we can all return to our source whole. I saw that if my light did not touch someone it was not because I wasn't shinning it was because of a block that was denying the truth of who they are. I know that everyone originated from this light from which I was seeing. I know that this is the same light people speak of seeing before they die. In this light there is only love. It is all encompassing. Shadows do not exist because they are burned away as if they were never there at all. I know that the light never goes away it can't it is the reason and the source for all that is.  (As a child I remember moments of clarity when I would realize I could not die. I'm not referring to my physical body but that part of me that knows that I exist. That is what I called it as a child "that part of me that knows I exist".) I have no doubt that this is God, Energy, Higher-self, whichever name you choose to give it, it is the source from which we all come. The vail was lifted and will be lifted for all that ask to see. 

I was also shown that all answers can be found here in this light. We as individuals are a perspective of that same light much like the facets of a perfect diamond. We are all healed because within a diamond there are no shadows. Looking back at the light for answers is the same as looking deep within and knowing the truth. Nothing is being done to us it is all for us! 

  After this dream I had a few months of euphoria and I still live in this state much of the time.  I could connect to everything. All answers where SO clear. I have a renewed love for everyone including myself. The slate is clean I hold no more grudges, anger, resentment, disgust, or ultimately fear. I'm not saying at times I don't feel these emotions but what has changed is the knowing that I don't have to hold on to them. I recognize these emotions for what they are and  I am grateful for the opportunity to burn away the shadows and shine. 

 

What is Love?

Who do you love and expect nothing back?

This might sound like an easy question but is it? 

What is love?

LOVE IS A STATE OF BEING.  It is the truth of who "I am". I have no boundaries. I am always here. Love never dies .... Eternal. 

Forgiveness

Forgiveness 

Close your eyes. Take a deep breath and exhale all the way. Take another deep breath .... Exhale. Take a deep breath....Clear your mind of all thoughts exhale with out judgement let go of all thoughts. Picture a white room. Flowing white curtains. White floor, white walls, spacious no ceiling only the infinite sky.  There is a child standing in the middle of this room. This child holds the only color in this room. The child is calm and unafraid. You are the child. Look up what do you see? Your past and your future do not exist here. This is the you before experiences. This is the you that only knows love. That came for and from love. That can not be separate from love. Every thought that comes in that is not love is an illusion like a child's nightmare. It does not exist. Your mind and your heart are represented by these pure white walls. Reflecting back to you what you truly are. Pure and abundant in love, pregnant with love. Looking only to share it. Look up what do you see? It is only seen with your heart.

Living Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Living Beyond My Wildest Dreams 

    A revelation.... I am looking at my "dreams" in a new light. There have been times when I thought.... this is not what I wanted, this is not how I saw my life. This is not the picture that I dreamed for my future. Then I realized that often when I dream I am in a way limiting myself to what is possible. To truly live what my heart desires it needs to be beyond what I ever imagined was possible or even knew I wanted. Allowing the space for my heart to create beyond my "little" dreams. The truth is I don't know what I want. All I know is I want a life full of passion, joy, and love. How my heart archives these emotions I surrender to God. I Am grateful for EVERY experience! 

OBE

Out of body

Could it be that an OBE is actually an inner body experience. This reality only exist with in ones own mind which it also shares with the mind of a God. Could it just be escaping from form escaping the confines of ego. 

What should we do?

  Perhaps all these thoughts of what we should do, what we should eat, recycling, organic this and sustainable that... how many paper towels to use ... maybe this is but a distraction. Consider the idea that our attention is worth more when used for compassion, forgiveness, and love. Are these not what are needed most and that which you can never give to much. As long as your giving, lack can not exist. This will become a cord that runs through your life "organically" sewing together the fabric of our united existence. A cord of unconditional love. 

The Blessing Of Losing My iPhone

The Blessing Of Losing My iPhone

   I am shopping in the local farmers market in San Isidro, Costa Rica on a sunny Thursday morning.  I love this market it is, I believe, the second largest in the country. The selection of produce is exceptional! I dropped my car off earlier a few blocks away at Firestone the mechanic to get my oil changed. An hour into my shopping after collecting all my organic produce, I reached in my purse for my phone. I dig around searching and searching.... no phone!! At first I feel the butterflies in my stomach as I think since the zipper was not zipped on my bag that perhaps my phone fell out or got picked up by wondering hands. I quickly reigned in my thoughts. It is only a phone. I know that my thoughts effect my physical state of being. If the phone was gone then so be it, all is well. It can be replaced. I went around to all the venders I visited inquiring if they had come across a lost iPhone. The last time I remembered using the phone was at Firestone and I remembered sitting it on a table. That is where it must be. I leave my produce at the farmers market at a friends booth.   Walking out of the feria, there is an older lady in front of me walking slowly with what looks like very heavy bags in both her hands. I observe many people, squeezing by, passing her. I think of doing the same, thinking of my phone, then I hear a voice in my head say "help her".  I am consciously following my thoughts. I am being careful not to dive into the egos panic mode. I decide to instead do what "spirit" asks of me. I try to put the thoughts of God first. In Spanish, I ask the women if I can give her a hand. She hands me a bag and we walk. She is probably in her late 70's and the bag I take from her is full of produce. I speak a little Spanish but it is far from perfect. We talk a little on our walk she asks about my mother and father, my husband and my daughters. She asks why I live here away from my parents. I try to explain how I ended up here but I'm not sure she understands. As we come to a street corner we walk in the opposite direction of the mechanic.  My mind wonders for a moment but then I ask "What is truly more important in this moment,  right now?". The answer is clear. Help this lady and the next moment will be cared for. As I adjust my thoughts I switch hands and carry the bag that now represents gratefulness. Gratefulness as I look over at this lady with a warm smile on her face. Gratefulness, my heart is filled with awe that this moment was a choice that was gifted me and I was conscious enough to accept it. Looking at our reflection in the shop window I see a tall thirty something Gringa walking with a women that has mothered generations of Ticos from this land that I now call home. After many city blocks we come to her destination... a bus stop. I am in disbelief she was going to walk all this was alone! As I put her groceries down she says something I don't quite catch about God and an angel. I thank God for the blessing of losing my iPhone and for placing this angel in my path. 

  I walk back to the mechanic with a spring in my step and a heart full of gratitude! I ask, as they hand me my key, if anyone happen to see a pink iPhone on the table in the waiting room. "Sorry, no we didn't." I walk around back to my car unlock my door and sitting between the seats in plain view is my iPhone.